Hi Prem,
Don’t know why…just felt like penning down my thoughts. It must be night time now for you. Wondering if you were thinking abt me before gng to sleep?
This is something very eventful happening in my life….it no more my life….its our life….Both our parents are meeting the second time. And I am keeping my fingers crossed. Everything should go smooth. I wish I was there at home, to watch everybody getting prepared to go to visit your place. Mom and aunt would have been deciding on what to wear and joking all the while. Teasing me about every little thing that I would have said or done.It’s a pleasure to be with them at this very time. I am missing all that.
Thinking of this, I am now wondering how you must be feeling, getting anxious about things happening here, far way in a land that is distant by miles but close to heart otherwise.
Realization dawns now and then in life. So what did I realize now? Yes of course that I wanted to marry. I didn’t realize this until the day your parents came to see me. The idea of marriage was always a bit far fetched for me. I knew marriage was responsibilities in the disguise of bliss. Do you think I am very crude in my thought?May be yes. I did not have a positive attitude towards marriage. It scarred me a little. I knew I can no more decide things
on my own. I am that kind of a person who does not like to be dependent on anyone or anything. How am I going to be at my in-laws place? How do I talk to my mama, athai? I can not let down my parents at any cost. I have to take care of my family. Am I ready for marriage and am I responsible enough? Well a millions of questions. Then my brain will say you are not the only person who is getting married on this earth. Every Tom, Dick and Harry gets married. They
all have gone through this. And you will also go through this. Now there that’s me. I have all the questions and the answers too. I just wear different hats at these times?
My mobile is ringing. Yes, it’s my dad.
Dad: Hey, what are u doing?(My thought: Good Question dad. I am just unable to concentrate on my work and am sitting and typing out my thoughts which I
am going to post to him. If I were to tell you that what would you think, dad?)
Me: Just the usual stuff dad. Working, what else?
Dad: We are leaving in half an hour ma. Hmm…err…Okay your uncle wants to talk to you.Me: Okay dad!
Uncle: Sneha, “enna velaiaya irukiya?”(My thought: Oh My god!....now what?)
Me: sollunga Mama.
Uncle: If we have to keep the engagement day after tomorrow is that okay with you?(My thought: Oh My god! That’s just like my uncle. Pretty fast. …now how do I say that I am just waiting for it to happen)
Me: (after a moment of hesitation) I am fine with it mama.(I hear my bro's voice. “Look I told you I’d put a mottai if she said No” and all laugh. Meanwhile I went red here.
Understanding that this was a planned joke on me)
Uncle: (to ppl at home) Okay all of you stop laughing (to me) I am asking you seriously. Shall we fix up the engagement date if they are also okay to proceed immediately?
(I knew I was blushing here, unable to control the happiness showing on my face. Just that I was in office, otherwise I would have jumped up and down)
Me: (a bit slowly but firmly) yes mama, I am fine with it. I am fine with anything that you plan.
Uncle: It’s getting late. Bye then.
Me: Bye.
I am feeling exactly like Sushmitha Sen said, during her interview immediately after she became Miss Universe. Yes, it was exactly like a thousand bubbles bursting in.What a world. Did these people around me know what its like to get into all this? Na, I am the only blessed one here. I was boasting to myself. There is so much joy in being secretly happy. It’s like listening to your favorite song on a walkman. The world hears nothing and you hear everything.
Sneha, get back to work ma…now that’s again me. You see part of me is duty conscious too!?
Gosh! I wish I can speak to you at the moment. I am already elated. And again some one says, “ there is still a long way to go” Is that you,Prem? ?
Going to work now,
Bye,
Sneha
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